We all know a guy who’s got “It”. Nobody knows exactly what “It” is, but even so, we all know a guy that’s got “It”. Now, I’m not talking about a guy that’s got the looks, or a guy that gets all the girls, or even a guy that’s got all the money. I’m not talking about any of that. I’m talking about the guy that other men look up to, the one that doesn’t crack under pressure. The one that always seems to roll with the punches and just have all the answers. In this article I’m going to outline 10 mindsets that will start to build the framework for that character.
1. Culture. One of my absolute favorite podcasts to listen to is “The Joe Rogan Experience.” This guy can hold an intelligent, respectful conversation with anyone on the planet! Do you have any idea how hard it is to have your guest one day be the most published doctor in the world and the next day it’s Mike Tyson, and you can do an incredible, successful show with either one? This comes from being diverse and well cultured. Don’t ever look down on anyone or anything. Just learn as much as you can from them, their experiences, their stories and their culture.
2. Be lethal. Jordan Peterson once said “A harmless man is not a good man. A good man is a very dangerous man who has it voluntarily under control.” This is the state of mind you want to live in. Under complete control but still capable of doing absolutely horrific things for the ones that you love. Remember that the more you sweat in training, the less you bleed in battle. Train in something… anything, but still train. Things like wrestling, jujitsu, firearms training, weight lifting or even football or another physically demanding sport. Hone in on a craft, whatever one you choose, that will teach you to channel your anger and strength when needed and allow you to put it on a shelf in the back of your head when it’s not needed. Whatever path it is you choose, never stop training.
3. Be humble, and kind. Never make anybody feel like they are less of a person than you because of how you act. That’s not a man. Be kind to strangers, help those that have nothing to offer you, and always do the right thing, even when nobody’s watching.
4. Be self aware. In every way be aware of who you are in that moment. Who and what you are affects the world around you. Keep your eyes and ears open and listen to your soul. Your energy is felt by the people around you.
5. Keep learning. Knowledge is power. Teach yourself about technology or how things are done in other parts of the world. Teach yourself how to build an engine or how a wind turbine works. Teach yourself about crypto, or the next “big thing”. The more you know equates to the more tools you have to build your empire.
6. Be unassuming. You don’t want to be the loudest guy in the room. In fact you don’t even want people to realize you are even there unless you want them to know you are there. It goes off the “grey man principle” that in an adverse situation you will inadvertently survive longer if you can blend into your surroundings.
7. Be fully aware of what’s going on around you. A restaurant, a stadium, a dark parking lot, hell your own block… pay attention to your surroundings. Make note of anything that seems out of place. Keep an eye on those things. It’s important not to panic in any situation, but if you’re in a dark parking lot and you see a man sitting in his car with the lights off and windows down, smoking a cigarette and just kinda hanging out, that’s the guy I’m not taking my eyes off of. People live their lives in patterns so when something looks or feels out of place there is usually a reason for it.
8. Be like a duck. Yes, I said a duck. Cool, calm and collected on the surface but swimming like hell under the water. Don’t let the world know your struggles. Your victories will speak for themselves. Only a select few people in your life will ever get to know you well enough to bother sharing your struggles with them.
9. Protect and preserve. Some of these things tie together with others. A mindset that is firmly implanted in my own psyche (that I try to firmly implant in my children), is to always stand up for and protect others that can’t protect themselves. There is evil in many forms in this world, and to ignore someone who is being threatened by these evils and do nothing about it, makes you no less evil then them.
10. Confidence is key. Self doubt will kill any dream you ever had faster then anything else in your life. Be confident in everything you do and nothing is impossible.
Now, I’m not telling you all of these things because I exhibit them, in-fact I know a lot of them I don’t. At least not yet. But what I do have is a knack for observation. Over the years I’ve paid attention to the guys that I’ve met, or even just observed through the internet,or some other form of media. I’ve noticed is that some of these men just really stand out. What all those men had in common were that they all exhibited multiple qualities on this list. As these components start to mound together, for a man, he will then start to become more and more of an “It” guy!